I had a bunch of weirdass dreams last night that I blame partly on the heat and partly on watching Stranger Things right before bedtime. Apart from that, neither of them really made sense. All I know is that I woke up dead tired today with my head full of fuzz.

In the first dream, which I barely remember, I was in some sort of warehouse. Except this warehouse was in my actual house (so it was a house warehouse). I chanced upon some intruders so I called the police, who conveniently appeared instantly. However, the police decided to simply start shooting the intruders and it all went Reservoir Dogs very, very quickly.

In the second dream I was being kept prisoner in someone else’s house (no, I don’t know if they had a personal warehouse too). After many months I finally twigged that my captor left for work every day and it would be safe for me to climb out of the window and escape. I then wondered the streets in a state of shock until I chanced upon a convenient police station, into which I headed in order to report my lengthy ordeal. However, as soon as I started speaking, the officer on duty, apparently very moved by my plight, burst instantly into tears. The rest of the dream was taken up by me trying to plot the location of my former prison on Google Maps. Not with very much success …